Now
by Syrae
Summary: One shot. Written a few years ago but never posted. Set in a completely different universe where Harm and Mac had a summer romance at sixteen. A chance encounter.


A/N: It's been forever since I've posted anything. I found this in my archives, never posted. Completely different universe. ;-)

* * *

It shouldn't have been like this. It was never meant to go like this. But somehow, she found herself in the middle of a party, sipping champagne, wearing her new favorite pink dress. She was laughing with some friends; people she'd come to know over the course of time that she'd been here. The two most important people in her life were chatting somewhere in the room, while she was having fun. So were they.

She didn't see him at first. She was crossing the room from the entrance to another pair of friends and did a double take. They hadn't seen each other in more than six years, and the thought of him alone made her whole being ache.

He looked the same. A bit older after six years, more matured, but in essence he was the same. The same person, the same man that he had been. And they'd said their goodbye's. So what was he doing here? What on earth had possessed him to come here?

When she saw him, her breath caught in her throat. She stopped, completely shocked at the very sight of him.

He spotted her; rooted in her place, glass of cider in her hand, wearing a pink dress, her hair done up, a few loose strands framing her face. Her eyes had grown wide with shock, or surprise, he couldn't tell. She'd grown. Her face had matured, her eyes had a seriousness to them that he hadn't seen before.

They stood still, in the middle of a crowded place, not aware of their surroundings. Simply staring at each other. The seconds seemed to stretch to hours.

Suddenly, she turned and walked away. She hadn't said anything, just started to walk away. He went after her, almost desperate. He wouldn't, he _couldn't_ lose her. Not again.

"Sarah…"

She jerked her arm away from him, not even bothering to look. Her lower lip was trembling. She took a deep, cleansing breath. Tried to get her emotions under control.

"What are you doing here?" she whispered. "You're not supposed to be here."

He sighed, not prepared for this reaction. But how could he possibly have thought that she'd be happy to see him? After everything that they'd done? After everything that had been said?

"Sarah… I…" He was at a loss for words. What exactly _was _he doing here? He, also, took a breath. "We…"

"There is no _us_," she backfired. "No, _we_. We decided on that six years ago, remember?"

As if he could ever forget that beautiful sunny day in August. She had looked more beautiful than he had ever seen her. And still they had made the decision to go their separate ways.

"Harm, we decided to break things off. We made that decision _six years _ago, and now you suddenly decide that you might want things differently? That's not how this works."

She was right. He knew that she was right. He trailed her cheek with his fingertip. Her eyes changed under his gentle touch. "I couldn't stop thinking about you. I _can't_ stop thinking about you," he corrected.

Her eyes teared up. "Harm…" She moved away from his touch. "Don't do this. It's not fair."

He wasn't letting go. He hadn't let go. The thing that she was trying to do most for the past six years, he wasn't doing. "Deciding to let go wasn't fair, Sarah. Not to either one of us."

Her father was watching from the corner of his eye. Her mother was trying to keep him in check, although she didn't understand who Harm was, anymore than her father did.

How badly did she want to hold him, feel his lips on hers… Another breath. "Harm… Please… Please, don't do this." She was pleading with him. Pleading with him to make this easier. But now that she'd seen him it wouldn't be easy. Never again. Like it ever had been. A single tear escaped her eye, and she saw her father from the corner of her eye move toward her. Her mother stopped him just in time.

She moved away, again. This time, he did let go of her. But the second his hand left, the ache in her heart grew. She felt like she couldn't breathe anymore.

He stuffed his hands in the pockets of his slacks. "The only thing I want is for us to have a second chance, Sarah. You're my whole life. I haven't been able to breathe properly since you left and I can't for the life of me remember why we made that crazy decision because the only thing that it accomplished is that I got hurt. That we both got hurt. The only thing that I want is you."

They had been sixteen. Both of them had been sixteen and they had had a wonderful summer. The summer had ended and they'd gone their separate ways. Both regretting it the minute that Sarah got on the plane. How he had found her now was beyond her.

He locked eyes with her. Sincere, loving eyes. "I love you," he whispered. "I've loved you since I laid eyes on you that first time and I never stopped." He paused and she didn't say anything in return. "I'm sorry that it's not enough." With that he turned around and walked away.

She had always learned that first loves didn't last. Not really. First loves didn't have a chance of surviving. 'You'll get over him,' she always heard. But her parents were each other's first loves as well. And they were still married.

Her heart yearned for him; so much that she literally started to hyperventilate. He was disappearing into the crowd; her parents were concerned, she could see it through a haze of tears. But if he disappeared again, her heart would break into a million little pieces and it would never heal again. The thought alone suffocated her.

"No!" She started to run after him, high heels and everything. "Harm, wait!" He didn't respond. "Harm!" Frantically, she ran after him. He stopped. He stopped and turned around.

Reaching him, she cupped his face and kissed his lips. For a millisecond he stood motionless; then wrapped his arms around her and deepened the kiss. Everything around them vanished. There was nothing but them anymore. They came up for air only because they had to. He trailed her swollen lower lip with his thumb, the ghost of a smile playing around his lips. But he left the speaking to her.

"You broke my heart once, you're not going to break it again. Not again." She looked into his eyes. "I love you."

He nodded. "Never again?"

"Never again."

When she turned around and took his hand, she met her father's eyes. He wasn't happy. Not yet. But he would be. Because the love of her life was back. And she was never, ever, letting him go again.

* * *

Thank you for reading.


End file.
